I Hope Fred's Not Dead

What a great day! This afternoon I went outside to enjoy my garden and decided to finally remove the violets that were covering the sidewalk.

I was ripping. I was pulling. Great immediate satisfaction.

And then I remembered Fred, which is what I have named any praying mantis in my yard. In the spring I had about 15 little mantises and since I cannot tell which one is which they were all named Fred.

I had seen Fred earlier in the afternoon on the steps that are about five feet from where I was removing the violets. As I gave one last push to the pulled violets into the trash bag Fred came to mind. "What if Fred was hanging-out among the violets?" I was suddenly quite worried that I could have killed Fred. If he was in there was there enough time from pulling to trashing for him to make a run for the other plants? Was he even among the violets? Surely I would have noticed him?

I consider the praying mantises in my garden as one of God's personal gifts to me. In the spring I would carefully water the plants as not to disturb the little ones too much. I noticed in the summer as they spread to other parts of the garden. They seemed to especially like my herbs. I feel honored that they choose my home and affirmed that I was doing something good in caring for my little space.

Perhaps the annoyance that I had forgotten about Fred would be the worst feeling I would have other this experience. But this was nothing compared to Fred's experience if he was among those violets.

"To whom much is given, much is expected." As the steward of that garden I should have been paying attention, watching out for Fred. We all have so much for which we are grateful, but that also means we have a great responsibility, even to the littlest creatures affected by out actions. I hope Fred's not dead.

More Together

There are several studies available to go with "Three Simple Rules." One of them asks these of participants, "Do we look at one another and see ourselves becoming more like Christ? Can others look at us and see God at work in our lives? Do we have life-giving lives?"

For me one of the great gifts given to and received from Dumbarton is the openness to support and/or join in with others as we each seek how we are being called to follow Jesus' examples, his modeling and mentoring. Certainly none of us are called to serve in exactly the same way, but there are times when we are called to be together, times when we care called to support one another, and times when we are called to hold one another accountable to our work of staying in love with God, or our journey of falling in love with God.

None of us can do everything, but by being in community I can do so much more because I am with my sisters and brothers in their ministry as well, and they are with me in mine. God asks a lot of us, but we are also given a lot to do it with.

Freedom to Stand-Up

Starting on page 37 it says that doing good is "a proactive way of living," this was part of the sermon on Sunday as well. In the book this is called a universal commandment without limitations, qualifications or exemptions. This is heavy stuff. It feels overwhelming and oppressive.

But it can also be liberating. I have permission to do good whenever I see the possibility. I can break the rules of conformity and social norms to offer my help instead of waiting to be asked.

I remember being told of a social experiment once when the test subjects were individually escorted to a room where they were asked to complete some simple survey. On the way in they passed a maintenance person who was on a ladder replacing a light bulb. Once in the room they heard the sound of a ladder hitting the floor and a person's moan. If a person was alone in the room, the person usually when to the door and checked in the hallway to see what happened. If there were multiple people in the room, they just looked at each other with no one wanting to be the stand-out person. Group-think caused people to do nothing.

But God calls us to be stand-up people. God has given us permission to break from group-think, and modeled good behavior for us through Jesus. So the next time the Spirit inspired me to do good, it's not the responsibility of doing good I need to think about about, but the joy of the freedom I have to stand-up and do it.

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30)

Generational Difference

I remember in the introduction to "Three Simple Rules", the author talked about his generation and writing that "Most of us never imagined we would be living in such a divided world. People of my age (Job is 81; born the same year as my father.) who lived through the Second World War were convinced that our world would be drawn together in harmony, peace, and plenty." The paragraph ends with the author writing that forgetting the struggles and sacrifices of the past may have led to complacency, individualism and Christians neglecting our call.

For me, born in 1968, the world was never a place of harmony, peace and plenty. I grew-up watching TV, of course, and on it were movies about the few people who would survive a nuclear war and the Holocaust, and evening news about famine in Africa, terrorists and, especially being from Ohio, the Kent State shootings. I only remember brief clips in my head, but growing-up the world was never at peace and the images I saw indicated this would always be so.

It was, in part, the hope I found in the Gospel that was my first indication that what I saw that status quo did not have to be the status quo. I knew that what I saw, coupled with people turning to drugs and money to help them forget reality, was not good. As a society we can hold-up all the heroes we want to, but that doesn't change the fact that we are often the creators of the dire circumstances from which classic heroes emerge. Indeed a single lamp shines brightest in the darkness, but that doesn't mean we have to turn off the power grid to everyone else's house.

What if we gave up the stereotypical heroes and the villains that always go with them, and opt instead for the everyday hero. The person who does doesn't respond to harsh words with more harsh words, but with kindness. The person who doesn't donate a suitable table to charity, but uses it until it is truly worn-out.

From my vantage point I too believe our world could be drawn together in peace, harmony and plenty, but not because of past sacrifices, but because of my hope that with and through God we can establish right relationships rather than sacrificing what we never should have had in the first place.

"Tough Love"

I have a clip in my head of a made-for-TV movie about "tough love" or in other words not enabling someone to do something that would harms themselves or others. It got me wondering about the shades of gray between doing harm and doing good.

When I think to not doing something, I tend to think of a future action or decision. But not doing harm also means looking at the entirety of my life and the impact or repercussions I have on others with whom I have a relationship. Like, say, what do I do to get someone to stop bothering me that while it may achieve objectives, isn't very good for them. This could be dealing with a relative or even enforcing the discipline needed to get a child in a healthy routine. Whether from intimidation to honest fatigue, sometimes we just give in and let other people bear the consequences. Are there patterns of harm in the way I live my life? As a Christian I feel I am called to learn that answer, reflect on how that meshes with being a follower of Jesus and then seek to follow his teachings better.

I'm not sure "tough love" is so much about the other person, but about how we deal with ourselves. Maybe the toughest love is owning-up to the repercussions of our own actions and not sticking our heads in the sand. I gotta go, I have some work to do.

Stargate meets Dumbarton

On Sunday the sermon (Thanks Mary Kay.) included a reflection on what we see as power and what type of power we appreciate or respect. In broad strokes, it is power to control, to command that we admire and desire (if not in ourselves then at least in our God) or is there a different type of power, the power of solidarity, of empathy.

Coincidentally I was watching a science fiction show (Stargate Atlantis) when the human doctor is being questioned by the non-human enemy/situational ally. She, the doctor, says that compassion is powerful the he can't comprehend her comment. He after all has the power to literally such the life out of human, and she can feel for the people he kills. He has one of those "Yea, right." looks on his face.

When I shift the orientation of my life away from what most people seem to want, this is the look I often get. People understand what I am saying, but they don't fully understand why I would choose such a thing, especially when it really is a choice.

It is well and fine to do good and avoid harm, until it irrevocably changes one's life and challenges assumptions about what is one's own American Dream. It is fine to dabble in a form of voluntary poverty (or living simply, or sustainably) until the retirement fund needs created. It is fine to work at one's calling, until money is needed to keep up with the Jones. It is fine to do no harm until the school bully comes to your lunch table. I invite you to share your own examples of where the pressures come from to put aside doing good or avoiding harm, anonymously if you wish.

These are the times when we learn the circumstances which will change the orientation of our decisions. These are the times when we hold fast to God who fortifies us with a power that confuses those who think they can control their lives and the lives of those around them. And we receive a peace that that power to live with life, with others bestows.

Before Even Starting

I didn't even get into the actual chapter when I already was writing comments on the title page.

In the first two chapters we explored not doing harm and doing good. And for me a natural question is what is harm and what is good. So on this chapter's title page I underlined "God" and made an arrow of my comment, "Defines for us what is good & what is harm."

In many was I see the "Three Simple Rules" as a practical application of Micah 6:8 "But he's already made it plain how to live, what to do, what God is looking for in men and women. It's quite simple: Do what is fair and just to your neighbor, be compassionate and loyal in your love, And don't take yourself too seriously—take God seriously." (The Message) or even Matthew 23:23 "You keep meticulous account books, tithing on every nickel and dime you get, but on the meat of God's Law, things like fairness and compassion and commitment—the absolute basics!—you carelessly take it or leave it." (The Message)

How do we know what id good and what is harmful? Many things can be easy, but some never are easy to discern and others can be distorted when we make the determination using our own self-interest or perspective.